Instead of letting toxic social media comparisons steal your joy, broker Pam Blair writes, embrace what makes you different.
Turn up the volume on your real estate success at Inman On Tour: Nashville! Connect with industry trailblazers and top-tier speakers to gain powerful insights, cutting-edge strategies, and invaluable connections. Elevate your business and achieve your boldest goals — all with Music City magic. Register now.
“Comparison is the thief of joy.” — Theodore Roosevelt
It’s 6 p.m. I’m tired but happy as I sink into my couch. The aroma of homemade pasta sauce lingers in the air. My dog and I took a long, sunny walk. Every task on my calendar is checked off. It’s time to relax.
Then, I start scrolling.
Within seconds, my mood plummets. A fellow agent twirls in glittering silver pants, celebrating her latest success. Suddenly, my good day feels … less. Did I do enough? Am I enough?
Social media works at lightning speed. A study from MIT found that our brains process images in just 13 milliseconds. That’s how fast comparison steals our joy.
The inevitable trap of comparison
Social comparison is hardwired into us. In 1954, psychologist Leon Festinger’s social comparison theory revealed our natural urge to evaluate ourselves against others. In real estate — an industry built on relationships — this tendency is amplified.
There are two types of social comparison:
- Upward comparison: Looking at those ahead of us for inspiration.
- Downward comparison: Looking at those behind us to feel better about ourselves.
As a lifelong overachiever, I’ve spent years measuring myself against the best and brightest. Sometimes, it fuels me. Other times, it drains me.
But today’s world has changed the game. Social media has made comparison unavoidable, often distorting reality and turning what could be…